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Almost Spring
Shuti Xu
This project investigates what happens when loss exceeds the representational capacity of language and the limits of social recognition. Drawing from Freud, Lacan, and Butler, I reconstruct a relational-affective framework to examine how suppressed emotion circulates when it cannot be publicly named or collectively acknowledged. Through theoretical reframing, observational analysis of “stuck” structures, and embodied experimentation, I approach mourning not as a singular act of closure but as an ongoing redistribution of affective flow. The book serves as both container and method: a structured space in which personal memory, social context, and conceptual inquiry converge. Rather than seeking resolution, this work proposes self-mourning as a cyclical practice, one that gently redirects what has turned inward and creates a narrative capable of sustaining life beyond rupture.

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Almost Spring
This short video presents selected spreads from the Thesis book alongside spoken reflection, offering a concise introduction to the project’s inquiry into self-mourning and affective flow.